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Dating a reformed player

Perhaps a husband cheated, or a long-term boyfriend abandoned them, or a man seen as having potential dropped them soon after sex. But if they believe it is their right to control the dating process, they should seek counsel.

This means that when they say something, they will actually follow through with it.

A player tends to offer false promises and often leaves you in hope rather than making the effort to act on those words spoken. Simple things like compliments can really give you a good indication of whether or not they want something serious.

They will book you up, make plans with you and won’t leave you wondering if they are seeing someone else at the same time.

A player, on the other hand, will never be able to lock anything in, only see you when it’s convenient for them, and will have no long term goals with you involved.

They will prioritise you in their life and schedule and make sure that you are aware of it.

A keeper will understand the importance of courtship and will value getting to know you first before things get intimate.Their actions, words and flirting will be respectful, romantic and inspire butterflies (not heartache!

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They love the chase and they have no intention of committing to plans – or a future with you.A player will usually have only a short term agenda on their mind, whereas a keeper will be interested in discovering the real you. When someone wants to be with you, they will make every effort to do so.This goes beyond only making time for you for a casual hook up.For example, a male client complained that he’s been called a player on a number of occasions—an accusation that angers and frustrates him. “Sure, on occasion I’ve slept with a couple of women with whom I chose not to commit to. I’m looking for the right person and it’s going to take time.Not all of us are sexually compatible and this is a good thing to know before remarrying. Besides, women have broken up with me without warning.” Yes, it’s all part of the process.In their defense, many of the women who use the term player have been traumatized by past relationship mishaps.